then the sea whipped me
for I had done wrong before


but even the bitch sea 
obeys the moon

++++++++++++++++++++++++


one round 
in the ground
another in the sky
one thing in my hand
it's a pizza pie

+++++++++++++++++++++


one kind of person 
can look at the sun
another can look at the moon
but me and myself, darling
I can only look 
at you
i would give anything for get up and go right now
like a deaf and blind
i want to lay down
like a dirty rock
i want to be left alone
like a plantation
i want to be burned
like ten trees in the woods
in a line
and even
like a man made forest
i want to be cut down
like ten fires in a row
i want to be in a circle
like a fire on my black thing,
you know.
mm my father will forgive me
anyway
like a fire in the wind
like a fire in the wind
i'm doing something
like in the day fire
in the day wind,
in the bright day
i still hurt
like a beacon in the day
you dont know me but it hurts
like a beacon in the day
you dont even know me
the devil
loves true
in his own way
like a beacon

devil does not hate
devil is
wearing a different color
like the devil
i slander
although all
like the devil
i do is love
like the devil
and the hard
straight path he walked
i do what comes easy
and i have the best intentions
the best love in my heart
like a devil
i like the color
red
and like
jewels
like a devil
i leave messes
like a saint
i do all sorts of things
like a saint
 my head is flat
and my head
is tilted
like a saint
i hold my hands
like a saint i am all around you
almost always
and wearing a big clothing
like a saint on the beach
i am following the waves
in and out and up and down
like a saint in a hood
i am walking
a wandering path
through the wood
on to sainthood
like a mouse
through the grass and weeds
towards sainthood
like a mouse
 through the grass
wasted days and wasted nights
champagne flights
having fights
why does wise man smell this way?
why does angel cough
count to ten then go away
fly there like a moth
sky
trees
houses
people
road
rats
subway
i want to take my machine everywhere
and just be on it
ah the moon is the only star in the sky that counts

just try and count the stars
bitch like a melody
sings like a bell

sweet like the sky
sweet like a smell
bitch bell
nice little bell
try and sing to me
about freedom
bitch
about your wedding
about liberty
bitch sing about love
bell, sweet,
sing to me in rings
while you lie
bitch sing to me
tell me you're free
tell me about freedom
bitch bell
on the floor
try and ring
try and tell me
about your
liberty
when i'm in the river i don't do nothing
one you do in a church
one you do in the woods
ah there's
married
and then there's
wed
nice little bell
lay there on the floor
try and ring
like a bitch
im screaming
in the night
like the milky way
i go slowly
across the sky
and am hard to see
in the city
like a starry night
 i move
like a sloth
bitch like a bubbling wine
bitch made to be uncorked
evil's egg

a mirror


i will face evil's egg
repeatedly
i face evils music
repeatedly
i care
smile to my ears
and show you my little teeth
to show you how raw my soul is
how good my soul is
when i'm in the river all i can do
is close my eyes
and make myself comfortable on the rock
when i'm by the river
thing that makes me better
is laying down
getting rained 
walking in the dirt
i get to a cross roads
and i can hear a river and see grass

the sun flattens me
it is bright and the moon is out

another day on the old road
in the sun
on the dirt
near the river
even in your dirt
 constellations
only you
only this old
hole

others arent others

 dont exist
even as dust
id rather be on your doorstep
forever i guess
than in all the others arms
once i found a small
rock that was heavier
than it looked
once I found a mountain
but I couldn't fit it in
still talking to my self
all day
I found a few little rocks
but I can't carry the big rocks
even if I find them
every other night
twice a night
the bird that went in some box
the frog that jumped in the sea
not the pond
the bee that went to the bell
instead of the flower
buzzing like a bee
and sleeping inside
honey
and playing inside
flowers
of spring
trees only sing
at the right time
of night in the right
kind of weather
and if the witch
happened to
cast some wayward
spell in the throes of
her nightmare
i have to live in the river
until the sun makes me sparkle
and the trees beg me to
come climb them again
And this time I know I lost a lot;
the mountain and the sea.
I only breathe a little bit,
and it costs a fee.
the woods cleared
and then i came to a river
it's like I was thrown out of the woods
straight into the river
only eight inches to go 
till im six under 
i've given up drinking wine
now i just bathe in it with my
entire body
i wish my black thing
that's in here
weren't so velvety
i'm carrying around my
glittery thing

but my black thing is still here
very bad decisions
almost every day
the secret of the flowers
is being spoken to the
bathos of the mist
dead charisma
winter wine
broken lock
and smell of pine
five feet under
five feet back
keep on going
and never look back
sometimes i feel that
all i need is a good
beating
by the river and the sticks
if only i was numb
and seven feet of
winter snow
could cover me up
it would not be made better
this time
by being on the beach
or rich
or healthy
but men are women though
and if you were in me
then we would be ok
one in I
is the one in you
i know it is true
because it flows
out of me like wine
Maybe I shouldnt complain like this
its only going to bring me trouble.
but what if complaint just flows
out of me like wine
I should keep them in
so they turn to diamonds
or blow them out
so they fall like rain
i think they thought
i needed to learn something
that ten thousand sandstorms
could never teach me
you could not tell
that I never was talking
to you, but to the
Black Shadow
because I was sent
as a messenger from
paradise
to relate something
little did you know
that you are in a black
well, full of monsters
mold and dead rats
and I am an angel in the sky
and I dont even have to have
feet or hairs I just
sing to the moon
and she sings to me
and our faces face eachother
with our eyes closed
cat turd stupid
shit i have to do
ass crack stupid
wipeshit
weighing on my
heart and mind
so stupid
dead pancake stupid
butt stupid
thing on my hands
Her winter's
almost over

this year
only five miles left
but i dont think
i should run them
maybe only the red river
can understand
and wash me
maybe if I go
to the river
it will turn red
at the touch of
my foot
unreliable
bility
just I cant help
that my left hand
and my right hand
are different
once a cherry
always a pit
on one side of the moon
there is something
&
on the other side there is
something too
baby
ice
aint exactly
wet
you know
although I'm sure I dont know how to pray
I feel perhaps I'm praying now
if I was born a bat
or a beaver or something
i might have a community or a
branch or a something to chew on
but i'm not and i dont.
it already is nighttime.
do i really expect it
not to be dark?
it already is winter.
i cant complain
of the coldness
when it already is cold.
one cant complain that they
dont like the ocean
the ocean is bigger than
one, right?
if its dark and its cold
and then I  just
Maybe what I need now
is cold water?
with sunshine in it.
Or warm water
that is part of the ocean
and the exposure that comes
with beaches.
Maybe I just need the exposure
I really dont know
if I can do it or not
this time.
I'm not sure about
the way green pines
or firs smell.
I dont like not getting
answers back.
I dont like to think of
myself as needy.
I like to think of myself
as rich earth.
As clean dirt.
I'm a black cat
at best
I think.
I'm definitely not
a grey cat
or an otter
at least.
I'm glad I looked like hell on the train.
I hope those kids will grow out of saying nigger.
I don't know if I should put myself to sleep
by taking a sleeping pill either even.
I'm glad we had dinner together.
And you just drank
and I ate things that I hoped
would get rid of my headache.
And you left early
and I stayed and waited
for a more important and worse-yet thing
to happen to me.
he drank himself
to death
in only a year
and his family
was quite put out
O I could have used
some of the chicken soup
I heard you ate for dinner
with a
happy couple
that made it for you.
To tell a cloud
you're so very
unhappy.
Or to tell the
ocean you
dont know what
to do.
only
poisonous
red temperature
reader
tells the truth
i could
be a swaddled baby
or under a river
or inside lots of things
I'm donning
all the wrong things.
I think I have been
an old man
walks into a
shop and sits
down on a
rock and
might as well
be crying
very stinky
mostly
and also
strained
so much
a hard moon surface
with nowhere to even
sit comfortably
the crater hole
came back again
and there's no
flower or rose in it
or dust even
back to the
raw black stuff
I keep around
again
cry
like a
baby baked into
a pie

then smile
because you are
warm and
there are cherries
all around
cherry cherry
ode to cherry
plain or
in my pie
on my cream
in my drink
on the rocks
with fizzy fizzy
love my cherry
red and merry
eat it in a bite
very cherry
flavorful
a dipdyychhh

until the end of the earth it will be
will be
like a ship on the sea
all strong
like a large thing in the water
like a mystery
it will be
it will be
like the thing in the wind
and all the energy
like a piece of earth it will be




bubble gum
bubble gum
i love it bubble gum
small gum
small sculpture sooo
wonder ful
i love bubble gum
i love it i do
it is cool
it is rad very nice to shake your hand
put you in my mouth and love you
bubble gum.
baby duck on an apple
just eating little gnats
he loves the little gnats
the baby duck doesnt love you
doesnt know you att all 
it thinks you are a shadow 
or a monster 
or them all! 
baby duck is so stupid 
and so hungry and so good
long live baby duck
and long live food! 
the kitten
it might cry
but for just a minute

and then it re-pounces
and bounces and hisses
she sits in the kitchen
on an old stool

and regards the wood
pin while she stirs the stew

the vapors they rise up
and wrinkle the paper

that sticks to the wall
and cannot escape there
and dance in the
river
that dances with light

and live in the rushes
with all little mice

and pray in the garden
like sweet insects do


and call to the clouds

and look at the moon
and sing your
sweet name
and swing on
a swing that
was hung from a
twig
and fall on the dust
that lain under
it
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